Grieving A Loved One: How to Cope

Grieving A Loved One: How to Cope

November 01,2011

5775839_lBefore delving into this topic, let it be clear that there is no cookie cutter way that one should grieve. Coping with a loss is not a simple act. It’s a process that can only be appropriately experienced through time and contemplation, and it’s an experience that’s unique to each person. Although it would be nice, it is impossible to put grief on the fast track to acceptance. The road to recovery can be bumpy and full of ups and downs. For this reason, it is important to find constructive ways of dealing with your loss. Seek A Sympathetic Ear While having room to deal with your emotions in solitude can be a comforting experience, it is important to open the air for expression with a trusted listener. Talk about your feelings of grief with someone who is sympathetic to your loss. Chances are that you’re not the only one who is saddened by the loss of someone special. Sometimes you just need a good shoulder to cry on, or someone to listen as your talk through your feelings. Grieve In Your Own Way There are many places that people turn when they are experiencing a loss. While it can be comforting to many to express feelings to family or friends, others seek outside attention. Some turn to religion to soothe emotional pains and to gain reassurance. Others consult the assistance of a therapist to help through the range of emotions that follow a deep loss. Another option is to join a support group for people in mourning. No matter where you find the most comfort, it is important that you are doing this for you. After all, no one knows you quite like you know yourself. It Is OK To Cry Contrary to popular belief, “staying strong” during a crisis is not very beneficial to anyone. When you repress your emotions, you are not allowing the chance to mourn in a healthy way.  Bottling up emotions can be very unhealthy. Plus, holding back emotions can cause confusion to impressionable young children and adolescents. If a child sees that his or her parent is not crying over the loss of a loved one, the child might feel that expressing him or herself in any other way is inappropriate. There’s truly no shame in a good cry, and it’s a huge stress relief. Don’t Expect A Timeline As much as it is human nature to wish for control in one’s life, a road map to recovery from a loss is a myth. However, this is not something to be discouraged about. Instead, look at it from the angle of there is no timeline or guide pressuring the right actions for grief. No one grieves in the exact same way, or during the same length of time. Seek solace in the fact that you can take your time to grieve in your own way. It may take a month. It may take a year. It may not be something that ever goes completely away. It’s your call to decide when you have grieved enough. No one else can make that decision for you. Grief is an amorphous creature. It takes a different form in everyone who is stricken with it. That’s why it is hard to know what to do or say in these times, and it’s important to realize that grief is a process that is completely unique to each person who experiences it. They say that time heals all wounds, and grief is no exception. Given time, reflection, communication and healthy expression, it is possible to move on from even the deepest loss. Thank you for reading.


Tue, 09/19/2017 - 19:18

[…] become quiet and withdrawn. Others may act as though nothing has happened. Watching a child who is coping with grief often exposes biases that adults have about how grief should be expressed. A child may seem to […]

Wed, 01/28/2015 - 03:15

Thank you; your website is very nice. I did not expect helpful advice when purchasing an urn. Happy that when i searched and found an appropriate urn i read you're a tight knit group or family. Awesome

Mon, 07/03/2017 - 19:33

[…] depending on how close knit the office is.   Reshaping The Timeline   As noted, you can’t expect people to grieve on a timeline. Too often, people suffering a loss are told things like “you should be over that by […]

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